So, 2012 has been the year of suck, or at least it's felt that way. The thing is that no one can make you feel bad about yourself except yourself. I've let the negativity take over this year and I've let the proverbial rain cloud sit over my head. When did I come to this conclusion? Over the weekend, I was doing some serious thinking, reflecting, about this last year while doing laundry. I was looking at my massive pile of race shirts from 2011 and in contrast my piddly little collection from this year. Yes, I had set backs this year but I still managed to eek out some half marathons. During the course of my pity party, why couldn't I stop and realize how awesome a feat that is in and of itself? The negativity was further fueled by training alone, not blogging, generally not letting others in. Why? Mainly, due to being embarrassed about how slow I am, how I haven't lost any more weight, generally stupid things that I let get to me. The thing is I am surrounded by some incredible, awesome and generally kick ass people, I don't know why I didn't rely on them instead of putting myself in a sort of self imposed hermit state. I'll be the first to admit that I can be the mayor of Crazy Town but I managed to out do myself this year, with regards to running and food. I obviously have some issues with food, and all the negativity I let in was just fuel for the fire. Now, who was responsible for my crappy year? No one but me, that being said, I am not going to beat myself up, I have spent the last 11 months doing just that...it doesn't work. There is a Dolly Parton quote that says "
start your day right . . .
11 hours ago